Are you reluctant to critics and critisism ?

What's your most common reaction to criticism  directed towards you?

Some people associate being critical with being less faithful , less sincere and such other negative feelings. But the question at hand is that is it really so ?

Personally for me, I have noticed when someone/something is very near and close to me I feel more free to be critical of that person or thing. For example, Let me begin with myself .. I think I am biggest critic of my own personality, and I do this purposefully in order to grow. No criticism , no growth for me (But I also remember to take care of the positive points). Same holds true for my loved ones, my work, some of  my close friends, and everyone/everything that I think is close to me and is mine !

But  when it comes to giving an ear to criticism it's not that easy for everyone, I guess first we need to analyze if it is really important to us and then we need to also "learn the art of accepting criticism". Since I am such a big critic, It's easy for me to critically analyze all things that are around me. When I do that I am almost always doing it because I love the one I criticize and I do it with the goal of growth in my mind :).  Once I was talking to my friend about my country and it's many shortcomings,  (who I later realized was not so open to listening to my criticism and took it not as a  token of my love for my country but otherwise) where I was comparing it to another  more developed nation...and it was not taken in good spirits of course. Then I gave a thought to the whole situation and questioned myself.... was I wrong ? I have noticed so many people getting on their nerves when they listen to ANYTHING negative about what is their own or what they associalte with their identity.

My question is that if we remain so anti criticism, how the hell on earth do we expect ourselfs to improve ? Then the only other way out is to not improve !!   :) 

There are two major beliefs that are anti criticism :

1. Some people seem to believe that criticizing or listening to any criticism for someone/something that is their own is equal to being unfaithful or insincere. Such people react very emotionally to criticism and are less likely to "GROW"  from it. For example : I know of a man who just knows many of his fathers shortcomings but always denies them when confronted. 

2. Some people believe that Criticism is something that is negative and bad. They have probably always overlooked its benefits and uses.

Some points in this regard to consider :

1. We all play the critics at some point or the other for someone or the other.

2. Criticism can be difficult to accept (at least immediately) but if taken in the right spirits can be really helpful in the development process.

3. All criticisms are open to either acceptance or rejection but before accepting or rejecting a piece of criticism, we need to analyze it RATIONALLY.


4. Those who can accept criticism and give a thought over it, are most likely to be very confident people.


5. Criticism as a growth technique should not be offered (or should be sparingly offered) to people who have a low self image or a low confidence as it might lead to more problems instead of help !

I found this article on ehow about  how to deal with criticism , for anyone who might be interested.

By the way, this blog and the blog post/s are open to critics and criticism, In fact they are welcome !!!  :)

Image courtesy : Photobucket.com and Google image search.

How these kids helped another "kid" in need...

I got these pictures through a friend, worth having a look J

Don't we want every child that we come accross , to be

as sensitive and as humane as these adorable kids ? J

Is there a connection between noise and celebrations ?

Once again I am going to talk in this post with special reference to our (Indian) culture in the present times and the "mistakes" that we make as a group. I am attempting to look in the minds of my fellow brothers and sisters ands understand the reasons for some of our peculiar behaviors.

The behavior of which I am making note here today is that, we tend to celebrate (it may be any celebration) with a lot of noise. We have a whole lot festivals in a year... the most recent one was “Ganesh Chaturthi" (Since I am in Mumbai therefore bigger celebrations for this festival). Like every year. There were visarjanas taking place on various days during this 10 day festival. There would be long Ques on the road with different mandals taking Ganpati for immersion and almost all of them bring a band along with them on the way to the immersion site. Not one, not two but multiple bands are playing at the same time… ending up in nothing but a cacophony!! These bands anyways do not play any meaningful music. It is really very sad that for different reasons, not one of them which are likely to be practical and factual, we behave in ways which are less civilized!

We are in society, and every society has some more vulnerable people like the old , pregnant women, people with hypertension or any other disease which makes them highly sensitive to noise, poor animals on the streets and in the homes (The hearing capability of most animals like cats and dogs is many many times more than us which makes them HIGHLY vulnerable to deafness or madness because of noise pollution during Diwali and other festivals).

I totally fail to understand HOW can be so insensitive towards the needs of those who reside alongside us and still call our self educated and civilized!! It is noteworthy that, in the modern world that man has created for himself, there are already enough sources of noise which are invariably harming the environment (therefore harming us). But many of these are factors are less controllable. The topic that I am dealing with here is the kind of noise pollution that can be totally avoided !! So are we trying enough to stop or avoid the harm that we can?

I thought about some probable reasons, why we as a community make our celebrations noisy:

1. Our thought process is such that, if we do not make noise (which many people call music) there is a subtle fear that we will be interpreted as "less happy".
2. We have never thought about other, more peaceful ways of celebrating.
3. Today when the world has started getting more aware about climate change and how we humans are causing it, we as a national community seem to be totally ignorant about it.
4. "Sensitivity towards the needs of others" has gone somewhere at the bottom in the list of our value systems, (and selfishness seems to have come up?) such that we really do not care as to how much we are harming others by some of our actions.
5. Probably some people might even be scared that if celebrations are not done in this particular way, the Gods may not be happy about it and subsequently we might get punished !! J
6. This way of marking and announcing our celebrations has now become a norm and to change this norm is becoming difficult for us.

Any opinions in this matter, specially by those who have experienced this factor? Comments are welcome and will be appreciated J

Just as I was writing this article, I realized that there was an NGO in Mumbai city -"Awaaz.org" working towards this cause. This is what they have to say about this issue.

Picture courtesy : Sundaytimes.lk